I live in a muslim country with little to no sex education. For many families, including mine, even a romantic partner is a huge taboo. I never thought much of it anyway and dedicated myself to studying. I got admitted into a good university far from home and due to my flying marks my parents kindly offered to rent me a flat so i wouldn’t have to deal with roommates.
I met my boyfriend a year and a half ago and fell in love. I didn’t initially want to have any sexual relationships with him until (unless) we get married but he did want it and i somehow grew passionate about sex as well. We’ve been having sex for about a year now and i thought other than the fact that i have betrayed the trust of my family by bringing a guy home and having sex, i may have a perfect life. Good scores that could help me apply to prestigeous universities elsewhere, a reliable man whom i love dearly and who worships me and almost everything i could ask for.
Yesterday all my hopes and dreams and spirit were shattered when i was told by a specialist that i have genital herpes. My outbreak began 4 days ago and i really had no idea why. I thought maybe that was because of shaving but it grew more severe and i hurried to a clinic.
Now hear me out (if there’s anyone reading) the only reason i got herpes is because my bf and i never had any sex ed. We knew nothing of STI’s. He had a tiny herpes bump on his lips the he mistook with a scar and we didn’t even know herpes can be transmitted orally. We still may know nothing of any STI’s and STD’s…. You may say we have access to the internet and we could search it but let’s be honest, who constantly looks up these stuff if they’re never taught to or reminded of?
Now i have to urinate in warm water otherwise it hurts SO DAMN MUCH and have to pray that my parents don’t pay me a visit cuz then I’ll have to suffer more, not being able to urinate in a basin and having to hide medication.
I feel terrible, lost, miserable, and worthless. My boyfriend has been really supportive and he feels guilty about giving me herpes but i can’t blame him cuz he didn’t really know.
Only if we had proper sex ed we would have definitely been more careful…. And now i don’t know what to expect, what to do, or how to deal with a life long infection….