I am not back to where I was before I had quit or 3 months,but it does creap up.
I have found it is more so when I feel overwhelmed with anything, even as many think and I did as well years ago but even cleaning of any kind, today is a day off for me... had to go do a bit of shopping wanted to cean but... didnt want to do either , so I got a few groceries and a bottle of wine
you said it "it does creep up" addiction is a progresive disease, thats how it works, that is why no matter how good your intentions to cut down, you find yourself drinking as much, if not more than before- only you know whether you are truly addicted to alcohol - if you are it is time to get real- addiction to alcohol/drugs, KILLS it's not something to be played with - many people that i was in treatment centres with are now DEAD - whether by their own hand or from the physical effects of alcohol/drugs - either way their deaths were caused as a result of their ADDICTION -
We have chatted many a time Sue and I see that old habit coming back. I truely wish you all the best in your battles. Please stay busy and the thoughts of booze leave you for a few moments anyways.
Also, depending on weight issues, I am trying to eat more regularualy which in my case - I don't feel like drinking, just bloated...and stop.
I feel that way, too. I find that's the hardest test for me, doing chores around the house, casually picking up a bottle at the grocery store like I have so many times. I know alcohol would make the day seem somehow fun! Clean the house? Make dinner? Wine with everything! What a fun day! But then I tell myself those urges are only temporary and will pass. I sometimes gets so angry at being sober!! But I know alcohol releases endorphins, so the happy I feel from drinking is fake and this anger is my brain healing from not having alcohol, so I let my brain feel the anger (once it lasted a whole afternoon! I just raged and cried and .... didn't drink. But I didn't get anything else done either) and trust that someday it will adjust and be able to have fun without alcohol, and have a normal reaction to housework. I also wrote a contract to myself the morning after my rock-bottom when I was terrified of the effects alcohol had had on my life and my marriage and I re-read that as often as I need to until the urge passes. Sober 10 tough days.
for me I dont drink and get things done I just drink
I know it's very wrong... sitting by myself drinking and not doing anything just drink and lay on the computer, its not just the drinking I have to change it's all the old habbits that goe with it.
I believe you mentioned you do commerial art or something like that to make a living,
I did mention you to try going out to the countryside "FOR YOU". Did you do that and leave the booze behind? It's helped me 'cause I'm too paranoided drinking and driving.
You're right about it not being just the drinking but the habits that go with it - sometimes it feels like a complete life change is needed. I have found there are still things that I can enjoy without a drink, but not everything.
For me it's too easy just to stay in and drink, I am happy in my own company. Bit I've made myself do things especially in the afternoons so that I don't start drinking so early and also some evenings and I find I enjoy things much more when sober. For example, I go to the gym most mornings and instead of getting shopping on the way home so that I could drink at lunchtime and then the rest of the day, I come home for lunch and don't drink because I still have to go out to the shops. I go to the theatre and even though in the past I would have had a drink before and in the interval, I find I can enjoy it without a drink. I accept friends' invitations to things that don't involve drinking whereas before I wouldn't. If I have something on in the evening I no longer pre-drink which means I'm less likely to want one there. All sorts of little things really. I wish you all the best in your efforts
Like I said, that's so easy, but now I do loads of things and if I keep busy I don-t think so much about drinking. I don't blame the world. Hope you find a way forward
I used to drink partly because of work stress and to make the day go away, but it became a habit and so after I retired I was used to drinking so I carried on out of habit and of course had more opportunities to drink so of all got out of hand. I've had help from a counsellor and now have things much more under control. I used to only do things if I could also drink. Now I choose to do things where I can't drink, or drinking isn't an integral part of the occasion. Hope you can find a better way of dealing with the stress because eventually the booze will only add to the stress, if it isn't already
super way of dealing with drinking!! Certain activities where you cannot drink seems super and why not. Most people simply stay in the same habits and same pubs OR drinking places OR excuses to have another one but NOT YOU. Well done for getting your life under control.