i started a new job in july, and im happy most of the time. last month the doctor told me i have a problem with my ovaries and im premenopausal already at 31. im finding it painful to deal with this. i just cant. i felt like a knife stabbed my heart. the issue is that i am far from my family and friends and ive none here. even my doctors are not in this city. i dont want to quit and leave, but i need therapies. i need to freeze eggs. i need antidepressants obviously. i dont know what to do. if i quit and go back, yes ill get help from the docs and family, but ill be unemployed. if i stay here, ill keep this mediocre job but i cant take any time off to go back home and freeze eggs/get all the tests. and i really want to freeze my eggs-whatever is left. but i dont want to feel so sad i cant accept all this, i dont know why my mind is creating such a drama.
Hi please take my advice
i know someone who had the same problem as you with early menopause
THERE Is HOPE in herbs.
Take
From Amazon
white peony
black cohosh
vitrex capsules
don Quai
VItrex Fruit
shatvari
mother wort
-----
from the fertility shot
rejuvaflow drops
STOP
eating high fat dairy
cut back on sugar
Start eating
nuts
plain yogurt
green vegetables....
Stop smoking if you do.
YOu can FIGHT this I SWEAR
tell you dr. about the herbs- even if they are skeptical- so what. you will see they are safe and at the least it can hurt
I am telling u i have seen this work
Hi would it be possible to go back and forth and apply for a job back there. You said your job is mediocre and all that you love and need is back in the other city. Why not take the time that you need to get another job back there? You are so young do what will make you happy. Diane
Go home. Ditch the job there will be others. Think of yourself and your future and worry about the rest once you are among family and friends
hi,I am in shock and I now see myself as old. I feel like ive aged over night and all my dreams have been shuttered.
I agree with Julie, quit the job go home & sort out all of your medical issues. You won't be able to continue working there much longer when you have so much going on in your head. You need to put your health & your needs first, there will always be other jobs wherever you go
hi i really hope you google the herbs I am talking about.
there is hope
ill try. herbs never hurt. I dont know why in taking this so seriously. its just a hormonal thing
Hi Carrotcake. I have to tell myself all the time that just because I feel something doesn't make it true. So I say to myself "I feel I have aged over night" then I say that is how I feel but in reality I am 31 years old and have a long life ahead of me. So I validate my feeling but realize that that may not be reality. Do you see what I mean? Diane
i really implore you to do this along with a diet change.
i have seen it work, but you have to be diligent about it.
read about them, you will see.
I know what you mean. im shocked with how much of a coward I am!! I think I need to quit my job and move back home for now. ive started having nightmares,I cant eat. im a wuss
If I was close enough I would hug you, I am so sorry. I can sort of understand you, as I was raped years ago by 2 different men, it took me years to trust other men, I got married over 10 years ago and for 5.5 years ago I've tried everything to have a child and can't it's turned my world upside down! I feel completely gutted but don't be put off! There must be something you can do, insist they do something. You need any eggs you've got frozen. I don't quite know what else you can do.XXX
If I was close enough I would hug you, I am so sorry. I can sort of understand you, as I was raped years ago by 2 different men, it took me years to trust other men, I got married over 10 years ago and for 5.5 years ago I've tried everything to have a child and can't it's turned my world upside down! I feel completely gutted but don't be put off! There must be something you can do, insist they do something. You need any eggs you've got frozen. I don't quite know what else you can do.XXX
Sorry also go home, you need people you know and care around you. I never had family who did that, so felt totally alone.
im sorry this horrible thing happened to you. i am sure though that you will get pregnant one day. ive heard that when we stress about it ,we cant conceive. maybe its true?
i have decided to go back home. i know early menopause is not a disaster, and its not a death penalty or even close..but each person views their own problem as the biggest issue. im someone who cant handle stress and i get overly emotional, so this is a tough period for me. someone called me girl today and i burst into tears lol. i wanted to tell..what girl..im old now useless. ive made the mistake, to google symptoms of menopause, and now each thing i feel, i think its related to that. im such a weirdo.
It's ok, don't jump to conclusions yet....you don't know what one doctors opinion is, he could be completely wrong. My advice is....don't be so hard on yourself. I know plenty of women who have had to overcome endometriosis and other ovarian cysts, problems with conceiving etc. I think your best bet is to either go back home to ensure the safety of your eggs if pregnancy is something you want and just to get overall check ups or stay with your job and go to other doctors in your area who specialize in fertility and treatment...I can only assume that there are going to be more competent doctors in big cities than in small towns.....so that's just one thing to consider....more options. You can always get another mediocre job but maybe you could call your family to come stay with you while you are going through this so you dont have to quit and run around in circles. Stress is a biological function to help protect us but try to relax..herbs aren't going to fix anything either. But just remember...your identity isn't tied to motherhood. Your femininity isn't either. If a man doesn't want to be with you because you can't have a baby....to hell with him, he's worthless. I hope this helps.
I say ditto on what this guy just said. Well said came from the heart and sounds smart to me. In the states we say more than one way to skin a c**!😊
it did. thanks.
my family cant come here, i live 5 hours away, by flight. i will be going back next month. and we'll see what happens..
it has affected how i see myself. like an old 31 year old who wont be able to have sex again. but i hope in time these negative thoughts go away..and i want to hope, in general that it will get better. i also feel stupid, cos i am overreacting. i know i am, but i cant stop it
i think my best bet is to go back home
Nah girl, you're not overreacting at all haha, come on we live in post war capitalism where people will kill to get what they want. We all want things in life and you want a baby (totally normal) so then go make sure you can do everything you possibly can to make it happen. Also, make sure that your doctor doesn't undervalue your symptoms (plenty of doctors are not very good at what they do...doesn't take a genius to do premed and do 20 hr shifts for a few months straight). If they ever say something like "i think you're overreacting," or "your problems are psychological." Run and don't take it to heart. Stay safe and I hope all goes well. There's people rooting for you.
I know your family are far away but you need support, after losing my chance to have a child I totally understand you, it's feels awful. Who said you're overreacting? This is just terribly sad
You need to know if you can DO anything or if anyone else can. Ask to see gynaecology, you may get more joy there. You may be able to freeze your eggs, I'm not an expert, get on to the 'babycentre' website, THESE people are experts, they have helped me for all the years i've not being to have a child. Let us know how you get on and STOP being so HARD on yourself. X