My Anxiety and Stutter are ruining my life, what do I do ?

Mental health
1

I have had both anxiety and a stutter for as long as I can remember. The annoying this is that I can't help either of them AND they are the cause of each other.

I am unable to introduce myself to anyone new or that doesn't know my name, it starts with an A but I can't find the breath to just say it. This is because I feel nervous and when I feel nervous, my breathing goes all funny, when my breathing goes funny, I can't speak without stuttering. It's a cycle ): 

I will be starting a sixth form college in September and want to make loads of new friends, but I am unable to say my name. When I think about it my breathing goes all funny as well. 

I don't know what to do ): A speech therapist i've seen charges £50 per session and I dont know how long itl]'ll be before I am able to say my name and just generally. When im nervous(anxiety) I stutter when i'm not, I don't. 

I'm not the type to sit and feel sorry for myself but it's pretty hard not to when you don't know what to do to help yourself .. any tips

im a 15 year old girl btw

2

Hi, I was in a very similar situation to you at your age and you shouldn't be paying £50 to see a therapist, as help is available on the NHS. I'm now 45, married and it does get better, although my stutter does come back when I'm under a lot of pressure sometimes. From my experience a stammer and anxiety usually manifests itself from some psychological event in your childhood and it may help if you can identify what that was.

My tip for you is to try and relax, concentate on your breathing and just be yourself.

Real friends will see you for what you are and will understand and help you.

Good luck.

3

Hi Nee. Sorry you feel this way. Have you asked your doctor for some support. I don't know if they can refer you to a hypnotherapist or speech therapist but CBT may be helpful. Especially with the anxiety.

I read a book called "it's not your fault because you're not choosing" by Liz Ivory. She talks about that negative voice in our heads that tells us we're not good enough and reminds us of all our negative beliefs and experiences. She calls it the script. Everyone has one and it's there to keep us safe by stopping us coming out of our comfort zone bug it puts us down. We don't have anxiety, our cctipts do. Sorry. I haven't explained that very well but the book helped me realise that I'm not ill, I just need to ignore my script and focus on creating positive beliefs about myself and life. CBT is great for this. Good luck. Xxx

4

Hi nee, I know exactly how you feel... I have had a stutter too my whole life, ( I am now 62 yrs old ) I was just like you, school was at times a nightmare,,, but truly you will get more confident as you get older.. I am married with four adult children, and life has been pretty good...

A few tips that helped me were....

Have something in my mouth when I spoke, chewing gum,nor a sweet. ....at school just try to hide it in the side of your mouth...

Cough just before you speak, it helps to ease your breathing, very effective....

Blow your nose, ( or pretend to ) then it hides your mouth a little....

Pinch the side of your leg, anything just to break your train of panic...

I look back now, I barely stutter now, I wish I had not worried so much about it but of course you do....

One very, very important thing,

If you can sing fluently without a stutter... you do not have one, it is just panic, I learnt that when I was an adult ( I wish I had known that sooner )

People like you for you, you can overcome this honestly, just try a few of these tips, they completely !!! Turned my life around... keep in touch, I wish you all the very best wishes in the world,,, take care, Deirdre xxx