Thanks Paul. Excercise, thats a new one for me :-)
Good idea, get out the house, walk.
Failed....
Had a good day, re did Xmas decs, tried to walk the cravings off. Managed to speak to school without a panic and sweats. Came home vacuumed and thought I'd clean the fish tank. VERY productive day for me. Found quarter if a bottle of JD hidden in the bloody fish bucket off all places, it's the hubby's, he's put it there so I don't drink it lol. Too late now.
Now to stop my self opening the red wine.
What an idiot
Hi vic its 330 ish wed morning and i failed yesterday too, house we are selling deal got messed up , loads of calls and e mails and crap that a recovering alcholic doesnt need , row with wife then drink, drink , drink it was lovely to visit my old friend the bottle again, but now i want my friend to leave me agaun for a long while, i have just been downstairs cos my wife sleeped on the settee and ther is an un oppened bottle of wine in the kitchen, if it was oppened i would havee taken a swig ,i stil might open it while my wife s asleep, 2 bloody idiots on this forum vic !
sod it i oppened the bottle, bloody weak idiot , gotta sort this out
Hi Nantucket I am sorry that you had a bad day yesterday too.
Today is another day
i stopped myself. I didnt empty the quarter bottle. Poured 2 drinks, drunk the first and half of the second then tipped it away. That was SO hard. I feel like maybe I havnt failed quite so badly. Im going to draw a line under it, today is a new day and I will not be tempted today
No he is not helping at all.
I drives me crazy as he can drink and get drunk but not feel like he is dying. Saying that I know he is dependant as he drinks every night and finds it very difficult not to.
Cant tell him though. I need to deal with my own demons first
That is VERY difficult to do, Vic, to pour away a drink when you have an alcohol problem. You did well!!
Don't think 'idiot.' Think 'struggling but will win.' It's all too easy to tell yourself that you are an idiot and therefore make excuses for slipping 
Fight on!