hi i just tured 40 this year but for a year i have been a mess and not myself my periods have been heavier and a bit longer i have felt sad lonely and dont get me started on the crying even down to crying in restaurants when i am out for dinner with my husbands just felt i was losing me.i have pain in my hip and groin and pelvis everyday.finally i had to get help went doctors and had a blood test and scan get results thursday but one thing the scanner said was that my overies were quiet???.i have had noperiods since june either.i am on citalopram which i should take all the time for my ocd but me being me i dont but decided to start taking again and i must admit it really has helped with night sweats and hot flushes which i was having really bad and evened me out i feel hopeful again and a bit like me again even though i feel i have no control of my body .so results this thursday i presume are going to tell me i am going through early menopause any help tips or general experiences of how other people have coped very welcome thanks emma 
Oh dear. It is not easy. I began my perimenopause at 37. I had no clue what the hell was going on with me. I was up and down and blowing my fuse. I knew there was definitely something wrong with me when some Jeovah witnesses approached me to preach and I started shouting at them and got in my car beeping at them and shouting to get off my estate. I went to see my doctor and she said I needed help. I had just buried my son a year before and was dealing with the break up of my marriage.
I began taking fluoxetine that helped me calm down and deal with issues. I began doing counselling, family counselling. I went looking for help. I knew I couldn't do it on my own even though I had my friend and family's support.
Today I am on citalopram but due to anxiety and a lot of troubles (which now are getting sorted). Nonetheless even though I have beautiful daughters who are my companions and friends, a partner that I adore and is very supportive sometimes I still get overwhelmed. We are only human.
Try meditation there are great apps for that, find a counsellor and maybe u need the help of a tablet but speak to your GP about it. All I know is that it is hard and we are not super women and we need to accept that we need help so we can maintain our sanity and help our family and for the family to help us. Whoever is on the outside cannot understand how overwhelmed we can feel not do they get it. Only who goes through menopause can.
Be well, here for anything you need. Xx
hi thank you for replying and really sorry for your loss i have 4 children well i say children adults really cant imagine what you have been through .im glad its not me that thought she was going mental so much anger i had .its so hard because i have a husband that trys to be supportive and probally has taken the brunt if im honest but your right noone undrstands how it feels unless you are going through it .i thought i was going mad but the citalopram seems to help will see what doctor says on thursday when he gives me my results its the pain in my hip and pelvis that is getting me down maybe its all connected.in someways i feel i have lost my self and no control ver my body this thing is happening weather i like it or not thanks for replying xx
We do feel like wears losing control. I had no husband, and even when I had one the last thing he was, was understanding. A month after Ben died he couldn't understand why I was still upset. Nonetheless I had many friends and family who helped. Citalopram worked wonders for me. I had a horrible pain in my hip as well but it was sciatica. Before getting it sorted with a chiropractor I was taking pain killers that messed up my stomach. So all that got me real down. Once I saw the chiropractor all was sorted with the pain. Pain is something that gets you down big time. If u have pain on your hip it shall radiate to your pelvis. Try seeing a chiropractor or osteopath. He will will assess you and believe me their hands work magic. If u r in London I can send you the clinic I go to. But pain brings u down. So maybe it is time to eliminate what brings you down and increases the menopause symptoms and find a healthy balance. It does get better.