OK theres been so miuch said about how the menapause is affecting us ranging from physical to mental problems, im asking do any of you ever feel like you dont want to go out anywhere, even somewhere nice! i dont think ive been out my front gate on my own for at least five years now, i only go out with hubby to the car, walk along to the bank, pop into a couple of charity shops then home, neighbors have commented about this to each other, whats my problem. going up mums tomorrow to stay for the weekend then home on Monday, love to see her and spend time with her but im glad to be home again.
Hi!
Not to the same extent, but definitely prefer to stay home more than I used to! I'm lucky though, as I've always loved sport and nature and being outdoors. Do you belong to any clubs? Maybe you could consider joining something you are interested in and see how that goes? You mite be pleasantly surprised ☺️Xx
Yes.... All the time. Recently I have felt better about going out though. As for going away from the house over night that can be an issue, but if it's a hotel or travel lodge/premier Inn I don't mind for one night as long as I have my space should I feel unwell or anxious!!! It's redicilous that I have to think that far ahead but I could not be staying with someone else while going through this. We never know how we are going to feel from one day to the be next! I must be able to take time out for me if not feeling sociable is that wrong?.... I am getting better than what I was, 18 months ago I couldn't even take the fig for a walk 😉 big hugs to you xx
That'll be the " Dog" not "fig" hahahaha! X
Yes, i went through that ..
Became a recluse, didnt want to go out, and had a feeling of impending doom, like something bad would happen, and anxiety..
it can take over if you let it, so try and go out ..
once you do you wonder why you didnt and actually enjoy it ..
jay x
Are you sure.......?!!!!!!!,x
Hiya
Funny you should mention this subject, as I only said a couple of hours ago to my husband that I haven't been out much this week (alright, we were out at the time!). But I think my experience of this is more 'I can't be ar*ed' rather than I lack confidence etc.
I have to say that I spend so much time with my husband (we ran a business together for 22yrs until 18mths ago) other people wonder how we've managed to stay married for 31yrs!. One thing I have noticed tho' is that I only really feel confident when I'm out with him on a night out, say. I'm not a drinker/dancer etc, so never really go out with a group of women (lost a good few friends due to studying and working so bloody hard, I now realise 
), but I do prefer to be with him in mixed company.
Having not had to work for the past 18mths, I mentioned to me sister that I feel like I've lost a bit of confidence generally, since I'm out of my very busy work environment. She also said it was probably the peri that wasn't helping. I'm inclined to agree.
I think I'm definitely with Bubbins with regards to joining a club of interest. You talk about charity shops: I'm not sure if you work? My eldest sister is a 'young 71' and volunteers at a charity shop. She's the 'timid' one of us 5 sibs, and also has a few mental health issues in later life (hence my hatred of SSRIs!!) so uses volunteering as an opportunity to make new friends. It works really well for her: gives her social interaction a couple of mornings a week and has broadened her social life greatly.
I wonder if you should have a chat with your GP because 5yrs is a long time to have felt like this.
Maybe if you felt like it, next time you see your neighbour you could mention you're feeling a bit cra**y, thanks to the cra**y menopause. I'm sure they'll soon start to understand how you're feeling.
Yes I can very much relate to what you are going through. I am usually a physically active and social person, but the last two years I have enjoyed my own company the best. I consider it a good day if I dont need to go out and I am ok even when the phone doesn't ring... Hope this is only a phase and won't be like this now from now on, but certainly enjoying my in time at this stage in my life...
Susan my mum was exactly like that good few years maybe about 4/5 ,didn't know at that time it was menopause,we 3 kids were still at school ,think she felt as you say Safe ,but prior to this happening my dad had just suddenly died .so brought I believe early meno at 42 .My looking back now she had it really bad me and my eldest sister have mentioned how bad she had it and panic meno attacks ,now I know how she felt . What you feel will pass as it did for my mum back then you were left to cope on your own ,not much improvement today ,but now there are these sites to get on and chat to others as you have .helps clear your thoughts hearing others get these issues .not so scary in your thinking then .Your get by this ,just another hurdle to jump over ,you will to .
I do go out but prefer to be at home feel more secure and safer.
Omg that i exactly how I am hate staying away unless I am in a hotel incase I am not feeling good and need my space thought I was going a bit mad.
It's definitely a security blanket thingy!! Hahahaha .... I no longer do or go anywhere I know I will not feel comfortable. Even if it means letting friends down or being a misery! I have to bring my own wellbeing first now and stop pleasing everybody else and meeting their needs as I have always done. Do you know what it's GREAT!!! Being in control & doing what I want to do .... I deserve that while going through this xx
Hiya Travis ,but you had a bit of a break through when you popped to your friends and had glass of wine just before Xmas ,Try that bit more often ,said you felt bit better .Its pushing oneself to doing things agaiin .Not easy if my balance was good again. I would be lot more confident ,tonight I went to local shop but could feel balance not great ,couldn't wait to get back home again .how long was I out 30 minutes .Thank goodness for on line grocery shopping I say .
Hi Marlene! 😃 💓.... Yes I now go to my friends house no bother now 👍 it's just 100 yards across the road. I can also take the dog round the block more so whe n weather is bad do as to concentrate More on that rather than is my balance going to let me down & it stops me getting anxious. Public transport I cannot see me doing at all, my car or nothing but still don't go into supermarkets on my own as that still leaves me anxious and too many people. If someone stops to talk to me then that is not good as I start to panic and over heat!!! 😳 I think cause I have made such a huge effort to go in I just want to get in and out but it has to be really quiet to even contemplate doing it. How are you doing Marlene? Have you had no let up whatsoever? 😔 xx
Jay that stays on my mind!! Doom and gloom, anxiety is terrible. Every pain I have I just assume the worst. It drives me nuts. And I have had this aggravating pain in my upper left side for awhile its kinda freaking me out.
There are times I just want to stay home and not go out anywhere but I would not make it a habbit because it can cause more problems you can become depressed and have more anxieties. Being active in a social group would be good than just staying home all day
Hi no still same old goings on ,I'm still staying local ,you tend to stay within your comfort zone ,all down to this balance we have going on ,I don't do buses ,never have done all ways driven .Never been without a a car .
I go in my local small supermarket,say 3/4 people in there I'm happy with that ,as know time I get to check out there be next to no line .Stupid it truly sounds. But I know you understand when it's an on going issue ,we both would love it gone ,or got this balance looked into ,I'm looking into hydrochloride acid for Eustachian tubes ,just someone with tinnitus and Eustachian blockage brought it up ,never know may help my rhinitis .
Glad your mate lives close by ,give you a break to go have a natter ,like me I have a cousin just a few roads away ..
I'm with you in the standing chatting to people ,exactly me ,when I see cousin in her home she knows my probs as I do hers so it's good in a way Travis ,we both understand how it is for each other ,she's a good soul to .
Well another week all got through .Cant believe how big a problem this is to loads of people but WHY .Wonder if there's one thing in common that we've had ,or done that's brought this about ,but penny not dropped .
You be careful ,keep taking your dog out ,maybe all be gone as it came .
we can but wish it xxx