Hi all. Advice if i may. I am having THR on the 23rd June at the age of 40. I am due to be best man at my friends wedding on 11th July. I am thinking the whole thing won't be a problem but my wife is convinced that it will all be to much, long day, speeches, socialising, discomfort. Ive been keeping a close eye on this forum to try and gauge what stage i will be at after 2 and a half weeks but really could do with peoples opinions as i don't want to try and run before i can walk !!
I had my hip op on 11May and I personally think you would find it all too much, I get tired very easily also once you have had it done if you are on anticoalagant tablets or injections alcohol is a no no but you will just have to see how you feel on the day
I think you'll find it very hard. You'll probably still be on crutches, maybe one, maybe two. You will certainly find it very very tiring.
However, I'm sure a lot of us would have loved to have some fun to look forward to in the days following the op and memories of it will carry you through the low times you may hit.
Luckily you men don't have to worry about carrying a raised toilet seat around with you but do be careful about any chairs you sit on - that they're not too low. It would be an idea to take a cushion as dining chairs can be very uncomfortable for a prolonged period.
At 12 days I attended an evening function.. Did OK but left fairly early. Think you will be able to do the ceremony bit, meal and speech but that that will probably be enough. With luck it will be one crutch craftily hidden if you want in the photos. You may need cushion for dining chair, and ask them for one with arms if you can. Easier to haul yourself up and down. Good luck and enjoy
I am a little concerned that i would get half way through the day and have to give up, wouldnt be the best scenario :-) , not sure if i should grin and bear it in the hope that the excitement of a wedding will get me throught the day.
With regards to the dancing, some would say that a wonky hip and a couple of crutches could only improve my dancing !! My concern is that the wedding isnt until 3.15pm so i might already be getting a little tired and grumpy.
Hi Matt ... maybe just be a guest - enjoy and have fun and when tired or in pain, you can go home - I agree with your wife ... too much, too soon ...but maybe you are one of those miracle stories we heard about prior THR surgery ....
Well first you need to establish if you are having anterior approach or posterior as recovery time is different. Me aged 66 would not have been able to but you may at your age. Best talk to medical team
Hi Matt, not the best timing but these things happen so its looking at ways round it.
Just after my op a very dear friend of 45+yrs suddenly deteriorated (cancer) and I knew there was not long. I had to weigh up the pro's and con's of a 6hr round trip or not seeing him, for me it was a no-brainer.
You will not be allowed to drive so arrange for a friend, sensble driver, higher-up bigger car with easy access and take a couple of cushions. If its more than an hours drive, stop and walk around for 10 mins. Take great care getting in and out of the transport.
At the ceremony ask for a carver chair and sit on a cushion, the arms will help you get up and the table will support you during your speach. Limit the booze.
At 3wks post-op I did the journey again for his funeral, a difficult day, again my friend drove (started 16.00) and didn't arrive home until 02.10 the following day but it is possible. Just don't sit for too long.
Hope you have a wonderful day, I will always be glad I went and although I was shattered the following day I was ok after a good rest.
Hi Matt I am 43 and had THR 12 days ago I think a whole day might be a bit long and getting into photo shots outside might be difficult eg on grass maybe do shots with u in church/ reg office. Also I wouldn't dance as u won't be able to twist and someone could bump into u. Could u maybe book into a room if it's at a hotel even if it's local so you can have a rest if needs be. I like a drink but haven't had one since home just not right with tabs and feeling bloated with morphine meds. I'd say go if its special to you but let the groom know u wont be able to do any fixing give that job to someone else. I've got a 50th birthday this Friday in a nice rest in London thought last week no way but to get out for a few hrs might be nice worst part for me will prob be car journey I was nervous of someone bumping into U.S. And ruining all the hard work the surgeon had done if hip was damaged also sitting in car itself not the most comfy!
Every person deal with a hip op in a different way. Some bounce back and continute with lfe and some taske months or even a year or two to heal. It is a major op and things can also go wrong. I can imagine your wife fussing and you not really liking it. But yeah most women will do that it is part of the nagging DNA ( That particulkar DNA missed me out for some reason ) Your Mrs is right to a point. But you have to put things in perspective yourself too. You have to judge how you feel as time goes on. That is all I can tell you. It is an individual thing and everyone reacts differently.
As others have said you will be Superman if you're fit enough by then....chairs and toilets are a problem....take a firm cushion for low chairs.....enquire if theres a disabled loo at the venue....use a bin bag to slide in and out of the wedding cars and take your pain meds plus some!!
The joy of the day with carry you through but be prepared to suffer the next day!! Enjoy!!
I am 60 so a good bit older than you bug I don't think you would manage . The tiredness seems to come over you in waves and you have to rest . Perhaps if you were not Best Man you could cope but better to tell you friend now so he can ask someone else . I am 17 weeks tomorrow , hip is fine but I went on a cruise last week and found it incredibly hard work and tiring!.
Forgot to say thats it does depend on your pain threshold and how fit you are prior to the op. I am 62 but dismounted doing a backward sumersault the morning of my accident. My injuries were extensive, 9 fractures of pelvis, 3 femur plus other soft tissue injuries.If you want to do it, you will. Dot.
Hi matt! Wow best man! Well done! To be honest you will still be on crutches! I was for 6weeks! As for speeches you will need to sit rather than standing up for any length of time! Please listen to your body! If your still on pain killers be careful with drink! ! Regards Amanda
Thanks everyone for your help, sounds like I should just play it by ear and see how things pan out, I guess everyone's recovery times vary so much. if it was earlier in the day then I'm sure it would be easy, it's just the timings that concern me, I don't want to be falling asleep through the ceremony or speeches 😊. Getting a little nervous now things are getting closer, but sure looking forward to a ( relatively) pain free future.
Go for it!! Make sure you dose up well on your painkillers that day, don't drink or dance and alternate between sitting and standing, you will probably have to leave earlier than most but hey, you get to be best man with your new hip! I agree with the earlier comments, take a nice comfy cushion, ( if your staying over at the venue grab a crafty nap when the speeches are over x
Hi, I was on one crutch by then, but had to pace myself. Think if you rest up before you go as its a late wedding, go careful and dont stand for too long you will be OK. I went to a charity function at 2 weeks post op and didnt think I would make it to the end of the night but I did, it was just a bit difficult getting in and out of cars, etc. Good luck xxx