Argh!!!
I know this is health anxiety all over, but every time I get a symptom, it'll come up with maybe 4-5 different causes, guess what mine is every single time? Yep! The worst, life threatening, horrible disease/condition you could have out of the choices. Im sure alot of you are the same.
Chest pain;
Could be anxiety, angina, valve prolapse or some birth defect.
I choose the last three, guess what? After all the tests, turns out it was anxiety
Blood in stools;
Could be piles, or could cancer.
I choose cancer, guess what? turns out it was piles.
Lymph node swollen;
Could be normal, or could be cancer;
I choose cancer, guess what? turns out it was normal.
Mole on my arm has gone funny;
Doctor says normal, i think its cancer. Turns out normal.
Argh this is my life round in circles constantly. My latest one is the other day I was under mad anxiety, all my symptoms were at 100%, i felt absolutley terrible. Then all of a sudden I felt this tremor/spasm/flutter that i get all over my body, feels like when your muscles spasm on your body a really fast flutter over within a second, happen deep in my chest, it only lasted a second but it took my breath away.
Now, i've narrowed it down to three things, anxiety, esophagus spasm and you guessed it, a deadly arrythmia (Venticular tachardyia)
On the morning of it i noticed a mole on my arm had gone funny again and i was having a full on meltdown, this is on top of my anxiety symptoms already been at 100% all week. So could it have been a panic attack? My panic attacks never last longer than 2 seconds, its more physical my attacks than mental, my breath gets snatched away from me and thats about it.
So thats option one, i know my anxiety was at 110% that day/week.
Option two; Esophagus spasm, I'd been feeling really sick in the build up to that day and getting acid reflux symptoms, was it anxiety and my acid reflux combined to cause my esophagus to spasm? My anxiety attacks in the past have involved my muscles tremoring for a split second very fast and my breath get taken away, was this another one of them but instead of my muscle it was my esophasgus?
Option three;
The arryhtmia, the one im obviously fearing that it actually is It's scary having your breath snatched from you, i know ive got extreme anxiety, ive had every anxiety in the book, everything, but ive also had every heart test done aswell and all has come back on.
So im stuck, ive been crying on my dinner break driving around pointlessly, telling my girlfriend i love her over text etc, i hate hate hate this feeling we're you feel like youve 100% got a deadly disease. hmph
i just feel worthless, ive got my first ever CBT on tuesday.