I've been battling anxiety day in day out for at least a year and 3 months now. I've never felt so lost in my own body. I don't look at myself as the same person anymore. I used to be this bright, bubbly outgoing girl and now I feel like I've totally lost my own personality. Does anyone else with anxiety/panic disorder experience these feelings/thoughts? I try and explain to my doctor but I get embarrassed and think to myself 'what if they think I'm going crazy?' .. it's the only way I can describe it. Can someone please give me their honest opinions & stories. I need peace of mind lol!
Hi Louise,
I know what you mean. I have good and bad days, at the minute I'm in the middle of a bad spell. I too feel lost in my own body. I am so fed up of feeling this way, and often sit and cry because I know how irrational my thoughts are, but they still manage to win sometimes. On the days when I'm feeling down I rarely want to leave the house, but I push on and leave because if I stay in the house I know it will make my anxiety ten times worse. My partner has also experienced anxiety and depression before, so he is a great help. He always talks me through it when I'm having a particularly bad episode. He reassures me that every time I've had an attack that nothing bad has happened and it will pass... I know it sounds trivial but it helps me.
I hate going to the doctors too, because I'm worried they'll think I'm crazy, but they know what they're doing. My doctor has been a great help and he does listen and talks things through with me. I have only been suffering since the start of the year, and my doctor has now recommended I speak with a therapist, so I'm hoping they will help get to the bottom of it.
Beckie
Dear Louise
These symptoms are very typical of anxiety. I find it is very reassuring to know that anxiety is very very common. WE are not at all unique. Many millions (literally) of people worldwide suffer from it. None of those people have gone mad or died as a result. It is a horrible feeling but a very human one. It is unpleasant and uncomfortable but that is all. It is nervous arousal in your body, part of your bodies natural protection system. It is nothing to do with mental illness. It is just that the alarm has gone off by mistake in your protective system and is being perpetuated by your worry about it. Accept it as much as you can. Relax as much as you can with the uncomfortable feelings. I had it for years and thought I was going mad and had lost my bubbly personality too. However when it faded away all of myself came back again. Nothing is lost, your bubbly self is still there waiting to came back maybe a bit older and wiser.
ps your doctor wont think you are crazy. My doctor tells me that at least two thirds of the people she sees every day suffer from anxiety and they all think they are going crazy!
Big hug you will be all right xx
my dear louise. I have been feeling like that for nearly 30 years..most of those years are a blur to me now, I was put on tolvon an old A/D it helped me cope,but left me very dizzy and confused, i slowly came off it, and felt better,but gradually the panic came back,worse than ever, looked to go back on them, but they are not prescribing them anymore...I have tried others, but cant tolerate them..your lucky, your GP listens to you, mine is just useless, I have all those feelings, you have,I take xanax as needed, hardly leave the house anymore, every day is a struggle, as my anxiety gives me different symptoms every day...I , used to be so happy and outgoing, I cry to get that person back,you are not alone, Anxiety is a living hell..only advice I can give you is,it will not kill you,it IS very hard to live with though, Take care xxxxxx .