Ah, an artist. Is that graphic art, advertising ... ? I am an accountant, and well I remember the pressure when I was at uni. In my first year, 6 weeks before end of year exams, I was several weeks behind and was working more frenzied for less result. A mate called in (to Canberra), and I took 3 days off while riding our motorbikes round Canberra, and showed him all the sights. I didn't think about my uni work, because I hadn't seen him for several years.
When he left, I found that I got more done in 3 days than I had previously achieved in a week. I had allowed myself to get ground down and could not see a way to address it. By leaving it completely alone for a long weekend I started fresh, and it saved my year and probably my entire course.
But even if you don't finish your residency, so what? I did Sociology as one strand in my degree, and I wish I'd majored in that subject. I studied Accounting because it offered a meal ticket, but my advice to my kids, was, \"Do what you love. The money will follow.\" I found some units (economics!) in my Accounting course were so bland and colourless that I could read a paragraph so many times I could recite it. Yet I couldn't care less about the academic argument as to the benefit of hoarding guns or butter. My point is, most degree courses I have looked over have several units which are both compulsory and stultifyingly boring, or just not immediately relevant to the course. It seems the board of studies includes these units to broaden the education, but then many students therefore aim at 50% +1 mark, which negates the benefit. Doesn't it?
I suggest to you that you are defining yourself in other people's terms. Never ever allow someone else to define your value in your mind. You are a unique individual, with unique talents and gifts possessed in your combination by no other person. And if the course you are studying is not getting you where you want to go, make a decision. Is it worth doing those units you dislike intensely, so as to gain the degree? Or is the degree not worth a crumpet because it does not actually stretch you or increase the use of your talent? Is it not what you thought it would be? (They never are, exactly) Can you imagine yourself in five years time, doing your work and building on your study?
If not, think seriously about what you don't want to spend the next two years doing. If you're in a hole, stop digging! On the other hand, if you think you might be able to restructure your course so as to drop two units this year, pick up an extra one next year, or change the focus of your course by dropping a strand completely to take on another, why not ask the faculty admin if you can do this? If you ask and they say no, what have you lost? I can tell you that you will gain much more than you lose in any event, because you will have done something towards changing what is to what might be.
It concerns me that you say, \"there is no point to anything ...\" This is a warning buzzer for Life. Please, please seek professional help. There are caring professionals going to work every day, whose aim in life is to offer help to those who need it. Girl, you need professional help. I could not have got through without help, which came in the form of a GP, a psychologist and a psychiatrist, all of whom listened, asked questions, made suggestions, and discussed the what if's with me. I had lost my family, business, mobility (broken knee), and could not organise myself well enough to drink a cup of coffee I had made. With professional help I was prescribed Efexor, which was horrendous, then Citalopram, which worked for me. Like you, I didn't eat, even when I had cooked I just did not feel hungry. For months I dwindled while becoming mora and more apathetic. I went for days without showering, not even wanting to get out of bed! The worst time for me was January-February 2007. I was in an impenetrable fog, just coul