we have just heard that a close family member is critically ill in New Zealand and likely to pass away imminently. My husband is planning to fly out ASAP but we are considering whether I should go too.I am 7 weeks post op from enterocele, rectocele and perineal repair and doing well. Not uncomfortable sittIng in normal life, things still feel swollen after walking.
I have done done the trip quite a few times, though usually with a bit if a midway break which won't happen this time. Have checked aurline and travel insurance and am at an OK length of time to do from their point of view. As I mentioned in another post, I am not scheduled for a check up for another couple of months
Anyone else done a v long ( it's 26 hours + with a transit I the middle) with similar or have a view on this ?
i have usually gone Business before ( frequent flyer points from husband's travel heavy job ) but it will be down the back in Economy for this.
Oh gosh you poor thing. Hugs from New Zealand. Is it possible to ring your Surgeons rooms and ask them to urgently get his opinion on such a huge journey. I wonder what the DVT risk still is too. What part of NZ are you trying to come to? I'm guessing you are coming from UK?
Hi Mari88 Really sorry to hear your sad news. sounds like a difficult time for your family.
I am 15 weeks post op from rectocele and another procedure to tuck my bowel. at 11 weeks my husband booked me a surprise weekend away, this was in uk but ment a 6 hour drive x2, now i know its nothing like flying for the amount of time you will be but it really took its toll on me, infact its taken about 3 weeks to get over. i found immense pressure from sitting and we stopped every hour, you wont have that luxury though you can walk around a bit. it really took it out of me.
Like Robyn says I seriously recommend you phone your consultants clinic to see if the secretary can speak to them for you. this is a massive journey without the emotional reasons you are travelling for and Im not sure if it will set back your recovery. which is why you need to check.
After all that I hope you decide what is right for you and if you do travel I wish you a very safe journey.
please let us know how you get on and my thoughts are with you and your family
best wishes Mik x
Thank you for replying - you must be up quite late ! Just to Auckland, so no onward, thankfully. My husband is now going to fly out tonight ( in a few hours), taking suitable luggage for me in case I do decide to go in a couple of days after various things have been arranged. I am not worried about travelling on my own like this - I did so, though only a short hop to Sweden, after a cystocele repair last year and just got assistance for lifting bags into overhead lockers etc. This is a bigger deal though.
Thank you for your reply. We have just been out for an errand and sitting on a firm car seat for a mere half hour made me wonder how 26+ was going to be, especially with swelling, and I do tend to puff up. I also know that my stamina nothing like it normally is - I feel fine around the house but I am in a bubble at the moment. I am working but just part time from home in a very unstressful way and that is tiring me. I know that my surgeon has a clinic this afternoon, so may be able to get a reply to a message then.
it is my MIL - well into her 90s, and had been on amazing form until a few months ago. My husband has several siblings and there are international phone calls and emails flying around - we are all sad, but it has been a life well lived and she is not in distress, from what we here.
I am not rushing to decide - there are arrangements to make here and I need to think through all the implications.
Oh bless her!! Very sad for you guys being so far away!! I live in Auckland!! It's 11pm here. I'm a night owl. If I can help out at this end then please let me know. Hope you can make the right decision real soon. My gut instinct tells me you shouldn't do it! It's a very long way as you know & one long leg of it needs to be a sleeping one. Plus you've got a complete flip of a time change. Safe travels to your Hubby. Cyber Hugs
Thank you
My husband is a brilliant sleeper on planes whereas, even on the occasion we have had First sectors with flat beds, I sleep not a wink. There is other family in Auckland so places to stay etc. My feeling is leaning away from going, atm.
Great that he can get good sleep on flights. I take pills on long haul sleeper flights!! All the best & thoughts are with you & your family.
Obviously if it is essential you go, you could do it. However, at 7 weeks your stamina is nowhere near back to normal and you would likely be too tired and achey to do anything once you arrived. It could mean you distracting your husband from what he needs to do for his mother, possibly.
Yes, the thought had already struck that I might be a liability rather than a support
My doctor explained no flying for 3 months BC of blood clots are a higher risk after surgery. Ask your doctor BC this is serious. Best of luck. I am terribly sorry to hear about your family member. Prayers👼👼👼
Thank you. The latest news is that she is still serious but comfortable- it would be good if my husband gets there in time.
I have remembered that after my anterior repair last year, I had an appointment to,discuss doing the posterior and they suggested that it could be done before Xmas. It would have meant only a 6 week recovery before a planned trip to NZ in February. I was doubtful and the consultant said flying nag it would be ok but I might be quite uncomfortable. It was therefore put off until Aptril ( changed to May ).
I think It is unlikely that I will go - and there is another factor emerging that my daughters are quite upset and I would like to be here to support them.
can't edit this, but please ignore the 'nag it ' that bizarrely crept into the second paragraph!
I think you've made the right decision and I'm sure your where you are needed with your daughters, which is just as important you always need your mum. Take care and keep resting xx
Just as a follow up, for those who were kind enough to respond to this thread. My husband was able to get there in time and was able to say his goodbyes then she had a very peaceful passing,surrounded by her sons. It was the right decision for me not to travel : my daughters and I had our own quiet time, exchanging memories and looking at many happy family photos.
So glad everything worked itself out. You made the right decision which was a tough choice but i'm sure your girls were comforted by you being with them.
My thoughts go out to your family near and far.
Take care Mikx
Happy to read it all went smoothly, although sadly. Also glad that you didn't rush and go too.