Need some strength! From somewhere anywhere I need things to change I'm so desperate please someone help me! X
There is always another option suicide aint the answer the matter how tough it gets. Chat to someone or even phone stress relief and tell them whats up dnt be ashamed your not weak your strong your seeking help. If you feel you are going to hurt or kill yourself tell these ppl you will get the number on google. If its that bad they may admit u for the night and give you something to calm down. Dnt let depression beat you its like the devil eating away at your insides.
You have things to live for you just need the right help plz contact someone NOW.
Don please don't! Call someone close to you or go to the nearest ER! Call 911, do whatever it is to get immediate attention! Don't hurt yourself. You wouldn't go up to anyone on this site who's hurting and kick them. Don't hurt yourself for hurting! X
Have someone close to you take you to ER - this is going to pass and you will get the help you need . Nothing to be ashamed of . The help is there you just need to ask . You may need medication but it will help Call someone now . Your life is worth more than you feel it is!
Sorry diff mean. Write how sounds don't want help there mine anymore but thank you for replies xxx
Hi bud,
I've been struggling with suicidal depression for several months now (suicide note, cheque to cover funeral expenses, etc) but there has always been something I have found in my life that has stopped me. I hate myself and my life but there are people who have invested time in me and I know I have a lot of love still to give to this world so I hold on one more day...and then another...and then another (even though the bad thoughts and feelings keep coming back). Life is a battle but it's also a journey. Sometimes we get to the end of the day and if we haven't "won" or felt we've achieved something, we think we have wasted our time or we might be useless. But that's not the case. Life isn't about winning and it's not just about surviving either. We share this journey with other people so you are not alone, my friend. Not everyone cares about helping others along the way but those of us struggling with depression know how important a kind word and a helping hand can be, just at the right moment. Stay strong. Unfortunately, no one else can fight your battle for you but you can get inspiration from outside yourself and the encouragement to keep fighting. Do one thing tonight that will help you to relax (music, reading, exercise) and write down one thing that you would like to do tomorrow. I've been meaning to visit a friend for a few weeks and I've promised to visit them tomorrow because I've got a gift for them (and a cake!) However small, promise yourself that you will do one thing that makes you feel good....and if it makes someone else feel good too then it's a double victory :-)
I'm sure your journey to this point has been a rollercoaster (I see you are a level 5 guru). You have given many, many people the benefit of your experience on these forums. Please now take the time to be kind to yourself. I believe in you :-)
Hang in there buddy. I promise to try harder if you do to....deal?
Keep in touch. You are among friends who do care.
Digsby x
So your just going to give up and let this beat you everything in life is a challenge but theirs always a reason not to do that u ryping like you are drunk dnt be crazy how would your family feel.
There are people out their that need you. You do have a purpose in life you just havent found it yet.
im sorry everyone's different but in me I'm sorry have asked post to be dejected sorry for writing it something's better kept to yourself ay? I am sorry xx
You are still typing you are still reading listen to me things will change no matter how hard the may seem its hard for us but you dnt want to do this dnt you care about any of us we have relied on your help all these times im begging you just fone the hospital u will feel different in the morning.
There must be someone in your life that you cant do this to dnt give up plz STAND UP AND PHONE TELL THEM YOU NEED HELP NOW
Thank you for trying help xxx
Post will be mdelyed by tomorrow' shouldn't written it I'm sorry x
Don't be sorry - you asked for help so somewhere inside there's a spark of a will to live !Im saying a prayer for you right now that God will carry you thru this and give you the strength- in Jesus name Amen. None of us want to have you despair - make a call and get help.Tomorrow will be a better day - hang in there!
Come on pet!
I'd ring you but my man is proper poorly tonight, has been for a while, so I'm on full nursing duties.
You know I know you a bit.
I'm begging you again, to please find the strength for those who love and need you, to keep fighting.
Huni I haven't slept in days, I've been bed bathing, medicating, feeding my bf, and I'm bloody exhausted.
I know you know how that feels.
I also know how you feel about your family and how much you love them.
Don't do this darling.
Call someone.
Please just call someone and ask for help.
Thinking of you always my huni.
Take care of you
xxx
Hey D!
Not a worry!
Nothing is not worth "keping to yourself"
We R happy to give some lift up for you
I keep going "I need things to change" as well, and people keep telling me "YOU need to change!" I can't control whats happening at my workplace as it disintegrates, HOWEVER what they say is I CAN control what I think about the situation.
I've found by experience that a psych should not be there to go "there there diddums" but to help me find solutions to the way I think about stuff.. even just talking about it to them helps. But when they suggest a way or structure of thinking that makes sense you get a great relief from that situation that you described to them. Unfortunatly it doesn't fix everything, but the more you go and discuss, the more bad stuff can be handled.
Really hope this helps.
p.s. as my place disintegrates, I have been reminded that "no jobs will be lost" so although job satisfaction is minus 20% at least my Mortgage is going down further than my spirits .
Hiya Dondon it's your friend Bev here. I have suffered from depression most of my life and spent a long time being very unhappy and thinking I couldn't carry on. One day I reached rock bottom and all I could think of was ending it. I spent a long time thinking about it then decided I faced a stark choice. It came down to either throw the towel in or give myself a chance to change my life so I could find, if not happiness, then a way to carry on and learn to like myself and live my life in a way which suited me. As you can see I chose the latter. I am mainly glad I did coz I would have missed so many good things in life.
I became my own project and tackled areas one by one. I decided I needed friends, even though I didn't know how to make them (had never learned). So I watched and studied people who were popular and saw how they behaved with others and then I copied them. I saw they looked outwards rather than inwards and were themselves, rather than putting on a false front. They treated others well and made them feel good about themselves. It took quite a while but slowly and surely I started making friends. That made a big positive change to my life.
I learned from others that everyone sometimes feels pathetic and useless and have all sorts of problems, but that was ok and it gave me permission to be like that too. What a relief. Everyone has a full range of emotions and that was ok.
Then I saw an advert for mature students to attend Uni. And I thought YES that's what I want, so applied and got in.
What I am trying to say to you Dondon is that you are ok and don't have to hide or feel ashamed of who you are or your emotions. Nothing will change unless you make it. No one is going to come knocking on your door to change your life. You have to do it yourself.
Little things lead to bigger things like the momentum of a roller coaster. Taking the first steps are very hard but the more you do the better your life becomes. Rather than sitting at home and obsessing about how awful you are (and drinking too much), you need to start looking outwards to find what you want and need in your life.
Do you still do the school run with your children? If so make an effort to smile and maybe make a comment about the weather to the first nice person you see. Just that. They will not judge you or think you are awful - they will just think oh what a nice person you are. Maybe they were feeling down and you have just cheered them up. Then carry on in little steps and it will gather force believe me.
We are all awful people sometimes but we are also all nice and loving, you are no better or worse than anyone else even though you think you are. That is the depression talking.
Ok if after this you still want to think about suicide, do what I do and look at sites on how to do it. The reality is very different than the fantasy isn't it? There is no painless way and you will see that. I only do that very occasionally but I always come away shuddering and thinking it is easier to continue with life. Then I start feeling better.
I hope this helps you a bit love. Pm if you need to. Your friend Bev xx
im sorry x
What are you sorry for Dondon? Posting this or about how you feel or what you might do? Look if you are determined enough to commit suicide then (I am not convinced this is what you really want), there is no one on this earth who can stop you.
But before you do think of what legacy you will be leaving your lovely children, and I have seen their pictures haven't I? I will have another look at them and think 'poor mites, you are going to motherless soon'.
You will leave them with a huge sense of loss, you will leave them with lifelong guilt that they couldn't make you happy, or stop you and they will never recover from it. Ok they would learn to live with it hopefully but would still be damaged inside.
Maybe I am being harsh, but I am trying to snap you out of this obsession that you are unworthy or a horrible person. Until you can start asking yourself some serious questions, instead of looking inward and punishing yourself for imagined and real faults you will stay trapped in this cycle.
What have you got to lose? Nothing - that's what.
And you know what? The more you obsess the more you will obsess. What you have to start doing is distracting yourself whenever you sink into this state, wash up or talk to one of the children. watch telly or anything. This is very hard at first but gets easier the more you do it. Trust me - I have done this and it does work.
I have a golden rule - I will allow myself to feel self pity and self disgusted but I put a time limit on it. Otherwise it would go on which is what is happening to you. The important thing is to start to take control over it which will empower you and that is the beginning of starting to make the changes you need to in your life. Ok?
Maybe you aren't ready to hear this yet and I just wish I could talk to you face to face and give you a huge big hug. Luv ya Bev xxx
Noooooo youre good!
At the very LEAST..
We feel good cause we talked to you - THANKS!
Other visitors on the forum see - like what Hyper said - that they aren't the only ones getting hit by this and are encouraged by the replies - and this forum thread is actually very positive!
Don't feel bad or sorry hey?
You've showed others what to do to - say not hold in. :P
Hope you have a GREAT day.
Have pm you Bev xx