i just don't know the cause of the depression... i talk to my self most of the time... i feel alone, left out.. i feel like every one hates me and every one is leaving me alone, so i shouldn't be alive now, i have no purpose in life, why am i alive? i feel like jumping from the tall building to end this suffering... the voices in my head just don't stop... My head just don't stop thinking... i feel so tired still i am not getting enough sleep.. i am not able to eat properly... i feel lost... initially i thought dating is the main cause.. But now i don't know... i feel like i want to talk to some one... any one... i feel angry at times i hurt my self mainer times as i blame my self for the suffering... What ever happens i just blame my self... i feel tired now.. i am done... i just can't bear this any more...
Hi Kru oh dear you are going through the mill at the moment aren't you? I am sure people don't hate you as it requires a lot of effort to hate. Dislike maybe. These are depression thoughts though and you cannot trust them as they are false.
Have you been to the doctors? Are you on meds/counselling etc?
You are not to blame for your depression and it is not a weakness in you. After all if you broke your leg would you blame yourself? Or just say it is one of those things? No you would get treatment to help heal it. This is what you need to do now so please go and see your doctor. x
thanks hypercat,
I was seeing a doc earlier, now i don't.. i don't like to take meds.. But i guess i should now... else things will be worst... thank you dear...
Hi kru
Please do what hypercat advises. It's so important to get the help you need and it's so important to take any medication prescribed by your doctor. The exhaustion your experiencing and loss of appetite is very much down to your illness. Likewise your views on life, friendships and the struggle of living is also your illness. You will look at things so differently when you start to get better. Please ensure you see your doctor and please please take your meds without missing any doses.
Your mood, appetite and health will all return. ..but you must do your part to make this happen by taking your meds. Even though our minds make us believe we are alone and nobody likes us... its not reality only our minds deceiving us. Just reach out to family / friends or doctor and you will find that they would very much want to help you. Plus you have got many friends on this site! Not only are we able to offer you a sounding board, many people on this site can offer a wide range of advice from their personal experiences.
Stay strong and please let us know how you get on.
Blessings to you
Lorraine xx
Wow... i can't belive how many people on here are like me... even if you don't have purpose in life try and make something out of nothing, try and be like your favoirite inspired character and show people that your brave... that helps because i found depression can be caused by negative thoughts about yourself, try and make yourself more vibrant and not so dull even getting a tattoo can increase your confidence. Anything which you can think of that you would like to see yourself to look try and do that. Your life and body is a canvas you can make it what you want it to be. My experience...
Thank you so much.... no body has every cared for me so much... :'( Thank you so so much with you people supporting me i don't need to look for other friends... yes i would visit my doctor...
Thank you for your support... I remember an anime character Naruto if you all know... he never gave up no matter what the situation was... similar people can only understand our pain... this is the best place i every joined... You all are my friends... Happy to have you all in my life... XX
Bless you xx stay in touch and give us regular updates on how your doing xxxx
We are definitely your friends xx
Hi Kru you are welcome love. I don't think anyone likes taking meds but they do have their place in helping you feel a bit better. Hopefully if you are on them it will only be short term. Counselling is usually a better option if you can get it. Take care. x
Yes you do need to look for real time friends as well Kru. Online friends are great but you need to connect with people face to face as well. x
hey hypercat,
Yes you are right. But i am scared if they won't like me or if they say i am sad and won't understand me then what will i do...
Hi to make friends you have to make aquaintances first. Why would you expect strangers to understand you? People like each other for a variety of reasons ie shared interests, a sense of humour, a good listener etc. My good friends I can talk to a bit about my depression but I usually find I feel better when in good company. Concentrate on them and not on yourself. x
hey,
No i am not talking about the start everything goes smooth at the start but later on when we get close then problems occur... well anyways... i would give more time to them to know me as well as i will take more time to know them as well... thank you... xx
Hey Kru,
You sound just like me one of the things I noticed from your text was the over thinking everything which can be a side show to Anxiety disorder? I had racing thoughts always wanting to find the why when I should have been asking the how to fix.... you need to talk to your doc get some advice as these feelkings are not permanent you sound like you are very stressed out also which not sleeping doesnt help! Hang in there get some help from your doc you'll be ok promise
hey stevo,
Thank you.. Yes i i would definitely see a doc...
-kru
Chin up matey it will get better remeber that