I feel like that batty cat lady from the Simpsons - I feel like I LOOK mad, and I am unravelling mentally and physically.
I'm 49 and have been going through the peri-menopause for a couple of years. First my periods were horribly clotty and heavy and every three weeks, now in the last six-nine months they've got further apart and lighter.
But it's how I feel that's so weird. I am shaky, anxious, when I'm talking to people I'm trying to think what expression I should be wearing on my face. I feel tired but not sleepy, like as if all my energy has been sucked out of me and all I want to do is sit down. Everything seems like too much effort and I am not enjoying life when I feel like this. Some days I feel great, but there are too many days like this now.
If anybody I know is going through a hard time, I've always been THE most supportive person, but lately it just makes me anxious because I feel I'm being sapped of what little strength I have left. I avoid people, especially high maintenance people.
I'm trying to force myself to take a shower now. I love being clean and having freshly washed hair, but even that's too much. My roots need doing but I can't be bothered. And I don't even feel human, let alone like a woman. I feel like I'm drifting away from friends, like I have nothing to bring to the table when it comes to being good company.
And I wonder if anybody has any experience of whether diet helps. I felt really good last week and I was eating well - could it be as simple as that? I've had a weekend of too many carbs and a curry this weekend.
Yes i know what you mean, im 49 and its been going on for a year and a half. Started with erratic periods, then first heart rate episodes, then hot and cold, periods were absent for 3 months then heavy for 6 weeks. Then the anxiety started but i think thats made worse by being away from my partner. Dont have much energy, have just started hrt in the hope it will change things. I got acid reflux, my god the lists endless, tried changing to a more soya diet. Havent really tried much else, from reading these forums it seems its hitty missy as what works for some people. My job is also a 24 hour one at times so thats exhausting too, i never in my worst nightmares thought i was going to have to go through this just because of periods.But it is helpful to read these messages just to know that we are not alone.
That's exactly how I am feeling as well it is horrible and I am also trying to find something that can make me to feel better I am in dire straits over this and also feel like i am never going to feel good again I have this strange head feeling and like I have to fight to keep my self upright and this shaky legs , I know what you are going true it's really bad
yep thats peri .... and what a great description, and i can confirm thats me aswell, I am aged 49 and in almost year 9 of perimenopause...
diet is always good, ie, a good diet, but I do not think it helps with the way you feel. not for me anyway.. i can totally relate to the not wanting to do a thing, i am abit like that today, I have to push myself, and then when I have I feel a buzz of contentment that I did push myself and then actually enjoyed the task in hand, and I smile as me too am the cleanest person and i actually have stopped obsessing over washing my hair as often as I use too, and i too look at my roots some times and then think, Sigh.... oh they will be okay for another few days... wow I really connected to what to said...
right now, I have been putting off doing a little job outside ( I live in Spain) and my mind is dealing with it hahahahahaha, I am thinking ... I will do it in a bit ( as then I will be pleased I did) but havent actually got to that push yet) most days I am fine, and others very sluggish and after being very very active the sluggish days are very frustrating... anxiety and feelings of dread are the worst for me....
Oh thank goodness. So glad you replied. Do you feel jumpy too? There's one of Catherine Tate's characters that screams when even a phone rings, and it's an extreme example of how I feel. I am just embarking on a three year degree in product design and would you believe that this is the time I'm introducing power tools to my hands and brain.
Do you feel overwhelmed? That's my main feeling. Like I have to work so hard to keep on top things? I haven't even spoken to anybody about it because menopause is a kind of national joke, and it sounds so pathetic to my ears to complain about the things I'm complaining about. My sleep to is rubbish.
The other feeling I have a lot is a kind of unspoken dread, like this may be how it feels to be dying.
hahahahahahaha Catherine Tate lady ... screamer, oh thats made me laugh....
i am more like the other... the one who wants to give someone a right good Back Hander hahahahahaha
I have a weird thing going on, this morning I got up and went into living room and the portable radio was on quite loud ???? Ugh .... it wasnt even on last night, I have a ritual at night, I turn TV off etc, then come back in and check everything... abit OCD ... no radio on... so how the hell was that on this morning... no one else in house, partner works overseas so no else turned it on.... think I am losing the plot 😮
LOL it's Scrange, not Judith, but I can sympathise with that too. I get about one name in four right these days.
Hunger shakes, yes, like my blood sugar level is low. Sometimes it feels like somebody's sitting on my chest. I was just doing a practical task earlier, using a glue gun and stanley knife, and looking how the project turned out... well let's just say it's a good job I'm not a heart surgeon.
Oh Jay, you and me both girl. I have to double check things because I don't trust my brain. I find myself chanting things over and over from one room to the next so I don't forget. And of course it does not good, because my brain has become a vacuous sieve. I put my purse in the fridge the other day - had the house apart looking for it. I'm always mislaying stuff - and recently I lost some clothes (I think I accidentally binned them because I'd put them in a carrier bag straight from the tumble dryer). I became convinced a neighbour had come across the fence to steal them because I couldn't see what else could possibly have happened.
When I shared my suspicions about the neighbour theft with my husband I noticed he was wearing that expression that Shelly Duvall's character (married to the Jack Nicholson character) wore in the Shining when she discovered him typing 'all work and no play makes jack a dull boy' over and over again in the cellar.
Scrangelina.... Sleep... OMG I havent had a proper nights sleep for years, I cannot nod off, its so hard, and then I wake all the time, then feel like I want to sleep when you should be up... its very common sleep issues with peri... I sometimes take the Melatonin 10mg and for real bad times the Doc gave me some Zopiclone, which I only use when I am so shattered that I have to sleep.. I only take half a tab as and when..
Dread and doom yes i get that, I feel anxious about everything, even driving to the shops, crazy... but once I get going I enjoy it, oh I wish I had a friend going through the same near me, be so much easier... like you say its not something you talk about is it... I get obsessed with negative feelings, like the wheels are gonna drop off the car, or someone will crash into me, which nearly did happen other day, so thats made it even worse...
a car came head on towards me, across my side and then suddenly he jerked his car away from me, missing me by about a foot, the idiot... thats all I need 😮
and... I still sat here, feeling sluggish, havent made my self move off the sofa yet.... maybe after another coffee
Dohhh.. the last post pending approval as i included a web address so i have reposted with put full web address..
Scrangelina.... Sleep... OMG I havent had a proper nights sleep for years, I cannot nod off, its so hard, and then I wake all the time, then feel like I want to sleep when you should be up... its very common sleep issues with peri... I sometimes take the Melatonin 10mg for Biovea website and for real bad times the Doc gave me some Zopiclone, which I only use when I am so shattered that I have to sleep.. I only take half a tab as and when..
Dread and doom yes i get that, I feel anxious about everything, even driving to the shops, crazy... but once I get going I enjoy it, oh I wish I had a friend going through the same near me, be so much easier... like you say its not something you talk about is it... I get obsessed with negative feelings, like the wheels are gonna drop off the car, or someone will crash into me, which nearly did happen other day, so thats made it even worse...
a car came head on towards me, across my side and then suddenly he jerked his car away from me, missing me by about a foot, the idiot... thats all I need 😮
and... I still sat here, feeling sluggish, havent made my self move off the sofa yet.... maybe after another coffee
Acid reflux Heather, yes that too last night. Felt like I had acid in my esophagus.
What I want to know is how are we expected to function in society normally feeling like this. Men have such a huge advantage, as usual. And God forbid we were to complain about these symptoms, society thinks its one big joke - I hang my head in horror that I used to too when I was a teenager. Maybe this is karma...
I take Maca, Estroven Maximum, Vit D and Calcium ( Natecal) Vit B 6 and Vit B 12 ... these do help ... I am twice as bad with out ... as I did stop them and OMG felt even worse again...
I am not too bad really, its just the odd slow day, not very motivated, and anxiety for me is the worst...
Everyone needs B-vitamins for good health. Without them we can suffer from a variety of serious ailments. For a woman going through perimenopause, B-vitamins can be essential for effectively managing symptoms.
Adrenal fatigue, for example, is a common secondary condition for many women going through perimenopause. B-vitamins support healthy adrenal function, along with calming and maintaining a healthy nervous system. Many women also suffer with mood swings during perimenopause. Both B12 and B6 vitamins aid in the production of neurotransmitters such as serotonin, a key brain chemical needed to stabilize moods and promote feelings of wellness and contentment.
For women who suffer with brain fog, and memory issues in perimenopause, low levels of B6 could be part of the problem. Depression, confusion, and an inability to concentrate are all associated with B6 deficiency. Vertigo, dizziness, and heart palpitations are also common complaints from women going through perimenopause. All of these symptoms have been associated with (among other things) a B12 deficiency. Vitamin B6 can also help with stubborn weight gain in perimenopause. It is key in the breakdown and utilization of carbohydrates, fats, and proteins in our diet, and is necessary for a healthy metabolism - both which can help manage weight.
Jay.... I also wish we lived nearer. I feel like we could talk and laugh about this all day. I already feel better for talking to yo about it.
I relate to the driving thing. Lately I've become stressed about driving out of slip roads on to dual carriageways or motorways, convinced it will end in the sickening crunch of metal and a motorway pileup.
But the other - worse - driving thing I get is that, once on the motorway or fast road, I start to ask myself 'holy sh*t which one of these pedals is the brake and which is the clutch' or 'oh my god I'm going to die I'm going to die I'm going to die'. It's like a reasonless anxiety and as soon as I'm on to a normal road that's fine. But being a passenger in another person's car... I have to struggle to behave normally and not shout 'that lorry is braking, slow down you moron!'. I just avoid being a passenger as much as possible.
And forgetful - do you get forgetful. Some sentences I speak make so little sense that people just look at me with pity in their eyes. 'Watched a good film last night, it was called.... mmm.. oh sh*t... well it started that bloke from that other film... he played that policeman in ..... oh what was it called... he's married to whatsherface, the one who was in.... oh well... it was a good film ... or I think it was..
Hi I am 47 and thought I would reply now or I will forget. Feel weird no energy not looking forward to anything, just can't be bothered with people. I don't feel like a women no sex drive , living in elasticated trousers as my stomach is so bloated. Just don't seem to want to dress up nice, hair is dry and dying. Everything is such an effort. I need to get the old me back .Help
😃 me too, hate being a passenger, ' my life in their hands '
and yes, I cant even remember what day it is sometimes, I turn telly on expecting a programme and its the wrong day 😞 and yes, if I lose something i think someones stolen it hahahahahahahahaha
if I hear a funny phrase I want to remember I have to write it down ..... good lord ....
need a shopping list or dont get my shopping as forget what i went out for...
also... do you have the runny nose thing yet, out the blue your nose runs and you cant catch it ... as it just streams ... its not a cold or hayfever, its just a dam peri thing, mind you since I started b6 that has eased off ...
I know peri and menopause is normal and we are not ill but its a bind all the same...
I have had almost 9 years of this, havent had a period since Aug 13 ( 8 months) so keep wondering how much longer I will be before I am full Meno and then I hear it gets no better 😏
12 months of no period they say Meno is reached... only had two last year... 3 year before...