I want to kill myself so badly. I tried earlier this year but I was prevented and given Prozac to treat my depression. For as long as I can remember, I've been suffering with ADHD, depression, anxiety, and various other mental illnesses. I have an abusive mother, and a father who lives across the country. I'm trapped. I've tried psychiatric help, medical help, every kind of help there is. Sometimes I feel better, but I always come back to wanting to die. Today I got mad at my two best friends- They went somewhere without me after saying they would let me come. They both know I have anxiety and I always get upset whenever they do things like that- but they continue to make me a third wheel. And to make matters worse, they humiliated everyone with them by showing them my texts and how upset I was. I yelled at them and they yelled back, and now I'm here with both their numbers blocked, my phone off, and looking for the easiest ways to commit suicide. I can't take this life anymore. My friends were the only happiness I had left and now they're gone. All I ever do is cause trouble for the people around me and I can't take it. I've said it before without really thinking about it; but now I'm SURE that everyone would be better off without me. After all, how can my own mother and friends be wrong when they tell me I'm an annoying, controlling, lazy, bitch? I've tried to stop- I really have. I've tried so hard, but now I'm giving up the fight. I can't take this. I need to die.
Honey you are upset, understandably, please do not do anything silly like killing yourself, you are too special and smart and wonderful to do that, may I ask how old you are?
can you get to a phone and call the Samaritans? I know it sounds corny but they really can help and you can talk this out, if you are a child and you feel threatened by your parents, call social services, can grandparents, call anyone you trust, please please do not think you are alone, your not!
You ou far from worthless, you just feel that way, I was you once, I'm now nearly 40, alive and fighting to keep my happiness, you can do it too, please talk to me, I'm really worried
Please don't do anything. Please don't. You are not worthless. Don't let the hurtful words and actions of others affect your life.
It's easy for me to say but however dreadful things feel right now, there could be all kinds of amazing things ahead of you in the future. Don't let all that go to waste.
I am sending you a virtual hug.
pen1976 is right. It's a good idea to call the Samaritans.
i will be thinking about you.
I am fifteen and I am a horrible person.
I am bossy and rude and selfish and lazy and a waste of space. I'm so mean to the people that used to love me and I drive everyone away. I'm loud and annoying and I procrastinate everything and I waste my big IQ by procrastinating and lacking the will to do any work in school. I need help but I just can't get it. Nothing works and for the first time in my life I'm so content with the idea of killing myself. It's like I don't even have any emotion anymore. I don't care what other people think. I don't care what will happen. It's like I'm already dead inside so why not just end it for all of me?
Hello all, I'm new on here, it's so unfair how isolating it is when we need friends who understand. I've been through the same, it's so scarey. Remember you are not alone and you're worth a lot
Please whatever you do don't take your own life - I know it might seem hopeless right now, but you have a whole lifetime ahead of you and there are people out there who do and will care about you and love you.
Please make the call to the Samaritans - I'm sure they will help and just being able to actually talk to someone who is just there for YOU will help you so much. I have thought about such things myself in the past, but have been lucky in that I have scared myself with the thoughts I've had and it's stopped me from doing anything. People do care, and the world will not be a better place without you.
Please make that call. Take care.
Doug. x
See we all care, you are far from worthless, in fact you are a wonderful person, you are just looking at what you think you do wrong, I bet you are incredible and interesting to be around
promise se me you will call the Samaritans honey? Please?
We are all thinking about you. You are needed in this world and there is so much future ahead of you. So many wonderful possibilities. It's gonna be okay. X
I would rather not do it at home with my mother around. She doesn't let me call anybody. I'm sorry but I honestly do think I'm beyond help.
Turn your mobile on, go to the bathroom, whisper if you need to, they will understand if you stop talking if she comes up to the room, you need to stop this thinking, killing yourself solves nothing, you have so much to give, so much to live for, you CAN do so much!
take action, don't let her win, if she is neglecting you, tell someone, get them help you need and deserve, do it sweetheart xx
Everything everyone has said here is right. Life feels awful for you now but please, please don't give up. We all care x
I don't think this is a issue that can be managed over the internet PLEASE phone the samaritans.
Dear dear friend !
I cant and wont call you worthless although I know that feeling very well myself and in no way would I judge you by that . You sound like you are in a very dark , desperate and lonely place . My heart bleeds for you . I can tell you have lost hope but let me hold onto hope for you . I think you need to know that someone cares . It sounds like you have never been cared for . There are people on this site who care deeply . We will be here for you . You need and very much deserve professional help too . Please go back to your doctor and tell him / her exactly how you feel . Maybe writing out what you have written here and giving it to them would be an idea . Please contact the Samaritans they can be really helpful or ,difficult though it may be , go up to casualty with what you have posted . Dont suffer alone With the help and support of others things will get easier x
sometimes it makes sense to know your own weaknesses. your personality is shaping, and its painful, if you make it out the other side you will be a stronger more logical person.
Hello,
I know you probably repectes the opinions of the poeple around you. And the negative things they say about you are really just distraction from there own lives that they are not happy with. So remember the people that insult you may be more mentally sick then you. If the people that bring you down were healthy people they would understand how sensitive you are and leave you alone. But from my experience in life people just say stupid stuff that pops in there heads. I try to stop and think before I say too much . Sometimes I fail and say mean things even to people I would die for. So forgive the ones you love for they are just as lost as I am and just as lost as most of the world. I think humans forgot how to love each other. And money stresses us out until we all are slightly insane.
james
I am still here, and I have an update. Said friends have officially left me. For good. With a hearty "F*** you" and scornful laughter, I've been left in the dust. And the worst part is I just bought and gave them both apology gifts, hours before they left. I have been planning to end my life, and it looks like I'm where I need to be. The final shove. I have no freinds, no supportive family, and fresh slits across my wrists. I'm not here for convincing- I'm here to say goodbye. The only thing that stopped me from taking my own life when I made this post was the fact that I was still clinging to some hope that my friends would come back. But this is it. There is no hope. The only people in my life who supported me have become part of the mocking, judging, scorning crowd. And that's it. That's all I need. I'm sorry.
Wow shocked to read ur messages please tell me you are ok xxxxx
Hello,
I would love to show you a different world. A world that is all around you but people in your life seem to hide of from you . Love and kind people are everywhere. I meet them everyday , my work forces me to meet and talk to strangers all the time. I wish I had more time in life to develop more lasting and great friends. You seem to be a very passionate and serious person. Your someone that can use these powerful emotions to bring some change to this world. Your insight and wisdom could help so many people. New people that have similar pain can really benefit from your knowledge. Help change the world one person at a time. My goal is the fight back against this world bring back joy and positive energy. Need so much help to realise my dream to make the world a place I like to live in. We are so close hope light will force away the dark. Much love
James
Thought same but wanted to know she was ok just incase , she has ADHD which I think we all have a little of with depression we all need to feel loved and wanted just hope she ok we all here for her to talk x
You are clearly more emotionally developed that you former friends and family. It doesn't soundlike they deserve the importance you have bestowed upon them. Try to rise above their cruelty and insensitivity, and instead focus on yourself, and finding a way to improve your life. Try to find another outlet for your feelings that doesn't depend on other human beings but instead makes you stronger and more in control.